Archive for the mothers Category

Aaaaaand… GO!

Posted in Books, kidlit, Middle Grade, mothers, Sci-Fi with tags , , , , on October 17, 2013 by Jessica Crichton

The world’s first and best children’s post-apocalyptic science fiction book is HERE! “Dr. Fixit’s Malicious Machine” by Jessica Rising is FREE for a limited time! Read it yourself!

Read it to your kids! Give it as a gift! Share the link with your friends and family! Let everyone know the mag-ness of, Guts, Glory, Books, Turtle and company!

Yayyyyy!

(I’m kind of excited about this…)

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The Five Best Things about Raising Kids Poor

Posted in Family, Family Life, Kids, mothers, Parenting with tags , , , , on September 11, 2013 by Jessica Crichton

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I see a lot of blog posts about parenting out there, and many of them are a lot of fun to read, laugh with, and relate to.  Still, these are often written about subjects to which I am woefully unrelatable, such as picking the perfect nanny, or how to get your kid into an ivy-league college starting in preschool. Now, I’m not saying these things aren’t relevant; I’m sure for many parents they are, or else they wouldn’t be written about. And I would never be one to judge any parent (unless they harm their children — that deserves a lot more than judgement, as far as I’m concerned). However, I am pretty sure I am not the only mommy out there who’s parenting world is a bit different than the perceived norm of soccer practices and brand-name baby carriages.

As I have written about before, I am not what one would call… well-off. Actually I’m not even middle class. Of course, when one says this, one is usually expected to follow up with reasons why being poor is a terrible thing, how they want to win the Lottery one day, how the world is awful and judgmental, etc.

I’m not going to do that.

As I said before, I’m not the only parent raising their children in what America calls poverty, and we have all heard quite enough about how horrible it all is. Heck, we’re quite aware of it in our own lives thank-you-very-much. But what I haven’t heard much of is the good things. The happy things. The wonderful day-to-dayness of parenting poor (as opposed to poorLY — that’s a very different thing). So, for myself and my fellow penniless parents out there, here is my list of the top five BEST things about raising un-monied children:

5) Our Kids Have to Learn to be Thankful

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I’m not saying that those parents who are better off can’t teach their children to be meek and thankful, but I am saying that poor kids don’t really have a choice in the matter. My own children have learned from day one that they won’t get everything they want in life, not because I don’t want to give them all their desires, but because I can’t. Seeing that Mom would like to give them what they want, but still can’t do it, not only shows my children that the world won’t just give them whatever they desire, but it makes them far more thankful for what they can have. Though any parent can teach their child thankfulness, poor parents have the automatic default of showing their kids — in real time — why hard work is important.

Which brings me to…

4) Our Kids Get Daily Lessons in Reality

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This is similar to #5, but not exactly the same. See, I am divorced from my children’s father as well as poor. This isn’t something I’m particularly proud of, but life is the way it is. However, it gives me a myriad of lessons to teach my children in order to improve their futures:

“Why are you and dad divorced?” “Because we got married too young — don’t do that.”

“Why are we so poor?” “Because Mommy didn’t do anything to get ready for having kids before she had you. Go to college. Get a career, not just a job. Be ready for your kids.”

My children get these lessons on almost a daily basis. My high school junior is planning college with a view towards a career, not just a degree, and my sophomore has said that she WILL get a PhD… because Mom now has a Master’s and she can do better. I’m proud of my children, what they have accomplished and will accomplish. I am also a natural spoiler. If I had money, my children would most likely be learning some very different lessons… and not the best ones.

3)  Family Time is AWESOME

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I’m sure going to the spa, or Disneyland, or beach house, or whatever is a lot of fun for some families. I’m even sure my family would enjoy such a thing. However, we have some pretty awesome family times ourselves.

For example, there are times when we do have some extra cash, so we have things like a T.V. and video game system for family-time livingroom sleepovers with popcorn, game tournaments, and family movies. There are also some great free, or close to free, family outings that we do on a regular basis. Here in Spokane there is a HUGE free fountain in the central park downtown where kids can run through and splash and have a blast. We go there often when it’s warm, packing a picnic lunch from our own home stores of budgeted groceries. This costs about $3 — for parking. We also go camping, which is a WONDERFUL time to not only give our kids some great memories, but spend real time with each-other without the distractions of T.V., laptops, or even cell phones. This usually costs a bit more for gas and some extra campy-style food, but we have some free campsites we like to go to, so that the total cost for an entire weekend of family fun is only around $40 max. Usually less. Wintertime offers parks for sledding with home-brought hot cocoa, or family game night with mommy-made kid’durves (usually tiny peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches and chips).

Of course, this isn’t meant to say that our family times are any better than anyone else’s, but it is to say that yeah we have it. And yes, it can be AWESOME. Still…

2) It Takes Work

JScience

So, you might be saying “how the heck is this a GOOD thing?” Let me explain.

I am not going to sit here and say I know what it’s like to raise kids with money. That would be asinine, and a lie. That said, I DO know myself, and I know that if I had money to spare, I’d probably take as many shortcuts as possible to make my parenting life easier. However, I don’t have money to spare, and so I have to take extra time to spend quality moments with my children. Between job-hunting, bill paying, and the everyday stress of not knowing details about the future state of either, my kids could easily get lost in the shuffle. I have to make a concerted effort to remember to give my twelve-year-old the scraps of cloth and holey clothes I find in the laundry so she can practice her sewing skills. I have to work hard at planning creative birthday parties around a non-existent budget, to sign my kids up for the free programs at school so they can go to cross country practices and sing in choir, to plan a special fun meal with nothing more than a loaf of bread and some frozen hamburger, to stop and hug my kids, even when my mind is racing with anxiety over how the electric bill is going to get paid…

My kids aren’t stupid. They span in age from 6 to 16. They see things. They hear things. They know Mom and Dad (my new husband) are stressing out. But they also see past that. They see the love. They see the dedication. They understand that no matter what, they are the very most important thing to us. And they know this because it takes so much work to keep their lives as happy, carefree and normal as possible, even while our own feels like it’s falling apart.

1) Our Kids are Compassionate

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Again, let me qualify this with the fact that I am not saying wealthier kids can’t be compassionate. What I am saying is my children have empathy for those in need, because they have been in-need themselves many times. We have been to the food bank where my kids have given other kids the donuts they just got, because maybe those kids don’t have a big sister who will bake for them later. My now sixteen-year-old daughter, when she was only eight and very shy, stood up for a friend who was being bullied because she herself was bullied so often for wearing the “wrong” clothes. My nine-year-old son shares everything he gets with his six-year-old sister, because he knows that maybe neither of them will get it again any time soon. I have been complimented in public, not for how well my children behave, but for how well they treat each-other. The words from one particular old lady will forever echo in my mind as one of the greatest moments of my life: “It’s so wonderful to see your children together. It’s obvious that they love each-other very much.”

Am I bragging? Maybe a little. 😉 But I have a sneaking suspicion that if my children hadn’t had it so rough growing up, they wouldn’t be so soft now. Sure, my influence and lessons have made an impact, but again, I am a natural coddler. If we had money, my kids would quite possibly not understand what it’s like to be in need, to be downtrodden, to be on the outside looking in. And without that understanding it’s very difficult to sympathize — let alone empathize — with others in the same position.

I’m not going to sit here and tell you that I want to remain poor for the rest of my life. Like the vast majority of people, I want the best life I can have for myself, my husband, and my children. This is why I have worked so hard to earn my Master’s (which I just received last month, hence the lack of job at the moment). Still, I’m a little tired of seeing only the bad side of being poor. Poor parents aren’t bad parents, and we aren’t always miserable, either.

In fact, sometimes being a poor parent is pretty danged great.

Quotes From the Daily Life of a Mommy Writer

Posted in Family, Kids, mothers, Uncategorized with tags , , , , on May 30, 2013 by Jessica Crichton

In case it hasn’t been made abundantly clear, I have kids. Five of them to be specific:

Kids1Considering their pictures are already all over my Steampunk Wedding page, I’m not too concerned with posting this pic. Though, as it is on that page, here they will be going by nicknames for their protection.

Zigzgging down from the top row from the left we have Hippie Chick (age 16), Drama Queen (age 15), Bratz Princess (age 12), Doctor Boy (age 9), and Baby Girl (age 6). Now that you can put faces to the “names”, I would like to submit for your approval (and some giggles), a few choice quotes that float around the air here at Casa Rising on a daily basis as Mom sits at her computer trying to work…

Doctor Boy: “Can The Doctor fly? (AKA Dr. Who) I bet I can! I need a normal screwdriver, though, cuz my window’s really hard to open.”

Baby Girl: “When I grow up, I’m going to be a spy at night and a teacher during the day!”
Bratz Princess: “When will you sleep?”
Baby Girl: “Duh. When I’m 36!”

Drama Queen: “Excuse me while I go find my dignity.”

Me: “Hi. How was your day?”
Bratz Princess: “I’m bloating and I gotta go potty. How was your day?”

Drama Queen: “Why is there PANCAKE BATTER in my COMBAT BOOTS?”

Baby Girl: “I already swept (a-tiny-toilet-paper-square area). It’s Doctor Boy’s turn!”
Doctor Boy: “Mom told YOU to sweep, not me!”
Baby Girl: “Nu-uh. You sweep (this tiny area) and I sweep (this other tiny area). Mom said!”
Doctor Boy and Baby Girl: “MOOOOOOOOOM!”

Hippie Chick: “I’ll be in high school until I’m OOOOLD!”

Bratz Princess: “I’m going to blow up… then explode.”

Doctor Boy: “That’s some bukly, BULGY baby!”

Baby Girl: “Since poop is stuff you already ate, you can eat it again, right?”

… and my personal favorite:

Hippie Chick: “BE QUIET! MOM’S TRYING TO WORK!”

Sound like your house? How do you work at home with kids? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Who are You… Really?

Posted in Books, Family, fathers, mothers, Parenting, Writing with tags , , , , , , , on May 17, 2013 by Jessica Crichton

“How can ya go by names ‘at don’t mean nothin’? That’s loony!” ~ Books, Dr. Fixit’s Malicious Machine

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Who are you?

To some, that may be easy to answer. But to most it’s very difficult. Most of us go through our lives trying to figure out the answer to just that exact question. In Nil, the Kids have figured that out — their names define them, and anyone who’s name doesn’t, is entirely foreign to them. In our world, too, kids know who they are. They have figured out their passions, their joy, their place in the world. It isn’t until they are teenagers — inundated with the world’s definition of who they are rather than their own — that they get confused… and for the most part stay that way until their deathbed.

So… who are you? What’s your Nil name? It is the name you gave yourself when you were a child, and thus, it is your only true name.

Remember. Be that person again. Live that life. Until you do, you will never again be fully you.

Hi. I’m Scribbler. I scribble stories.

What is YOUR Nil name?

 

The Top Five Mothers Day Gifts of All Time

Posted in Family, Family Life, Kids, mothers, Parenting with tags , , on May 12, 2013 by Jessica Crichton

As a 16-year veteran of momdom, I feel I have a pretty good grasp on what we would REALLY like for Mothers Day. So, you say you want to know what Mom wants? Okay, you asked for it:

5) A day-long sibling cease-fire.
4) Not having to hear the word “what?” even once for the next 24 hours.
3) Whatever it is, ask dad for the duration of the day.
2) Do the dishes. Yes, all of them. And that DOES include the sink and counter. Always. Without exception.
1) Clean. Your. Room.

Don’t blame me. You wanted to know.

John M. Cusick

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