Dungeon Delving

Flexing my fingers against the trigger at my hip, I surveyed the dungeon I was about to enter. I had been to many such deep, filthy places in search of treasure, but this one was by far the worst. Left for weeks without the services of a proper Dungeon-Delver, its nastiness had festered and grown, providing a home to some of the most hideously deadly creatures imaginable.


Yes the dangers were massive, but so was the treasure. I ducked inside.

Right away I ran into the first monster. It reared up at me with a mighty ROAR! The putrid green slime it was composed of made me gag, but I was no wet-eared n00b, ready to run at the first sight of filth. Quickly, I drew the weapon from my hip and pulled the trigger. As always in my expert hands, the +20 Elven Spray of Bleaching hit true, smacking the monster square in its gaping maw. Quickly, I followed up with the +15 Rag of Wiping on my other hip, removing the monster from existence and restoring the toilet to proper working order.

Kneeling down, I found a dime under the bath mat. Ah, yes. My first gold treasure. It wouldn’t be my last.   The laundry-dungeon was always especially rich in Septims. But it wasn’t time for that. Not yet.

I stood, glared around the bathroom-dungeon, and took a swig of my Stamina potion. As the tangy-sweet taste of Red Bull filled my mouth, I reminded myself that this was not finished.

Before the end of the day, I would find my children somewhere in this dungeon and rescue them from the self-created monsters that held them captive.

I got back to work.


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